Even though Halloween and the season of scary stories ended a few weeks ago, I was recently reminded of a terrifying, monster-filled anecdote that happened in my own life. I’ve told a story over MS Paint illustrations before, and I thought it might be fun to bring it back again.
Behold, the scariest story of all:
I know this story has a somewhat abrupt ending, but I didn’t want to leave you all feeling tense and terrorized for too long. The quick ending was for your sake. You’re welcome.
This story has a happy ending because after a shower and a few days of cortisone cream, I was good as new. Happy ending #2 – I later found a nice little desk job that didn’t involve being pelted with rocks by a couple of little hellions.
What’s the shortest amount of time you’ve ever worked at a particular job? What lead up to you quitting? Do you have any regrets for leaving so soon?
I LOVED this tale, especially as it happened in Texas, the land of smacked children!!! I was a nanny 35 years ago to a rich family in Scotland – I don’t know if I was allowed to smack them but on occasion I did. Mostly, I used reverse psychology but am slightly ashamed that I played on their faith and reminded them what hell was like!!! In Egypt (2002), when the neighbor boy annoyed me by kicking his ball against my fence, I went out and shouted at him. He immediately apologized, followed by his father who told me he had been punished for annoying the neighbor. Ah, happy memories. It might be nicer to move back to Egypt than live under a dictatorial narcissist with a thin skin. 👿
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Haha, I love you used reverse psychology on them! I understand a family not wanting to spank (and I didn’t feel comfortable spanking other people’s kids anyway), but to have NO consequences whatsoever just floored me. I made up my mind two hours in that I wouldn’t be back to that place, and the hives thing was the final nail in the coffin.
Whew, you know things are bad here when someone’s considering an escape to Egypt! 😉
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A quick smack was all that was needed but I am from a different generation. I also saw children beaten, which is abuse. I still give rows to stranger’s children if they are misbehaving…it is remarkably effective in a sharp Scottish voice.
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Given my job experiences and own background, I definitely have some feelings about spanking. Ultimately, I believe that mom in my story is free to raise her kids however she likes, but I was not going to stick around and attempt to get though it haha. One of the best decisions I’ve made!
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Nice entertaining story. The drawings made it more fun to read! 😊
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Thank you, Nina! I’m (clearly) a talented Paint artist, so I’m glad my skills are finally being noticed…haha 😉
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I could definitely relate…you know I also have this “hidden talent”, which I keep hidden until I find the right time & audience hehehe! 😊
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Oh boy – you definitely have me curious now!
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Haha! Nevermind…I’m determined to keep it hidden!
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Haha! Rats.
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Lol! 😁
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Oh gosh, I was horrible at keeping a job when I was young, and I had it nowhere near as bad as you!
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So none of your jobs made you break out in hives? Hmm I thought that was a pretty every day experience…
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I’ve actually never broken out in hives in my life…thankfully. Zits, yes, but never hives!
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This post is adorable. I babysat when I was in high school once. Only once… Does that count as a short-term job?
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Ha! I think it does. Did you just decide not to do it again, or did the family not ask you back?
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I didn’t want to. They were fine with me doing it again but I just wasn’t into it… so the next time they called, one of my sisters took the job. Maybe I was just a slacker… 😀
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Nah, I’m sure you weren’t a slacker! Something just didn’t feel right about that job 🙂 the only thing that appealed to me about this one-day job was that house. I don’t know what it is about my fascination with big houses. But the hives weren’t worth it…
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Hell, I’d love to have a big house. The one I live in is way too small… but real estate around here is grossly expensive. So I guess maybe I’m fascinated with big houses, too. ‘Cause I want one so desperately!
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This area is ridiculous in price too. I highly doubt I’ll ever make enough money to live in one of those homes, but I can still dream! Or, you know, just come live in yours 😉
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At the moment, I’d happily throw my husband out and move you in. 🙂 (Okay, I guess that may be a bit of an exaggeration… but I kind think I’m living in hell at the moment…)
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Oh, girl. I’m sorry 😦 You know it’d be a total sleepover with me there. Comfy pajamas, bowl of popcorn, and talking. And maybe movies with hot guys. I think that’s important.
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I’m just crying right now. And I’m very sorry for hijacking your post with my crap. Movies with hot guys is totally important. Plus ice cream. And obviously melty cheese… but probably not on the ice cream.
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We need the whole line up of sleepover snacks! If we get bored with movies, we can prank call our enemies. You don’t have to be sorry. Big big hugs for you ❤️
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Raw cookie dough. I want that right now. I guess it would be bad for me to mix some up for breakfast, huh? And thank you for the hugs… I totally need them. ♥
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Raw cookie dough is not really a breakfast food I suppose. We could have French toast instead – it’s way healthier! 😄 And then we’ll have the cookie dough for lunch. Or for dessert, after cheese.
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Haha! Well, if I don’t mind them being raw, cookie dough does have eggs in it. 🙂 Oh… and the cookie dough can be oatmeal… that’s a breakfast food!
Yeah, french toast… lots of cinnamon!
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Haha I don’t mind it raw either. Athletes supposedly eat raw eggs and look how healthy they are – clearly, if we eat raw dough, we’ll be just like them, especially if we combine them with oats. And French toast has eggs too – we’re total health nuts. Even if I do plan to drench the toast in syrup 🙂
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Confession: Whenever I make cookies, I eat so much batter that once the cookies are baked, I’m full. And I’ve never gotten sick from raw eggs. I also don’t usually know what the baked cookies taste like until hours later… or the next day. 🙂
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You might as well be confessing to my own life haha. I’ve eaten considerable amounts of raw dough and cake batter, and I’ve never even gotten so much as a stomachache. Sometimes I can’t decide if I want it raw or cooked – so I’ll compromise by under baking them so that they’re really gooey. Yum.
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Oh… cake batter, too. Just get me a spoon. Oh… brownie batter! My son asked me to make those for Thanksgiving… so I’ll be mixing this up tomorrow. That’s not going to go well… or it’s going to go very well, depending on your perspective…
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I’m actually making brownies tomorrow too, so we’ll both be in the same boat! And that’s a very good boat.
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I wonder how much batter I get to eat if I just make them in a 9×9 square pan instead of the 9×13… 😀 Maybe I’ll do some math… 36 square inches difference in pan size… … Hm… wonder how many spoonfuls that is? It’s about a 79%/30% split. I probably shouldn’t eat 30% of my batter. That seems bad. (Wow, I am a nerd!)
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I love how technical and mathematical you’re being about this haha. There is no logic when it comes to brownie batter! Also, I laughed when I read that you were considering a smaller pan because I decided to go ahead and make my brownies tonight and I did the exact same thing 😂 I strongly considered pouring them in a smaller pan so that I could happily eat the rest of the batter. I didn’t do it though. Sad day.
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I’m sure I won’t do it either… but it sounds really good. (On a whole different note… I was starting to feel better today but then someone kind of stomped on me… and I’m back to crappy! Am I jinxed? WTF? I swear… I’m cursed. You might wanna stand back!)
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Oh no! You’re not jinxed or curse, that other person is just a jerk. Give me their address. I shall go beat them up.
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I just question all of it… because as soon as I start to feel better, something happens to tear me down. Am I just not meant to be happy? That sounds so crazy, but I can’t help wondering… (and if you want me to stop clogging up your post with this, please tell me! email me! anything!)
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I sent you an email 🙂
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I love it when you do the drawings!!! Wondering how you that, actually, because I’d kinda like to give it a shot.
Yeah, so, as I’m sure you’re already aware, there’s about 70 billion different theories on how to raise kids. I had plenty of my own, before actually having kids…
And experience is very different from theory. Plus, kids are different from each other and what works on one kid won’t necessarily be successful on another.
At any rate, I think kids definitely need guidance and discipline. I try not to be more strict/harsh than necessary, but kids will test your limits and keep pushing if they can. “No rules” is a recipe for disaster. Just like you found…
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Thanks! I use good ol’ fashioned Microsoft Paint. I’m sure there are probably newer versions, but I use an ancient version that doesn’t let you do anything fancy. It’s part of the appeal, I think. Then I save each individual “page” as a JPEG and upload it like a normal picture. I love how they look too, but they’re definitely more work than a “normal” blog post.
Strangely enough, I like the idea of being able to give your kids as much freedom as possible to explore and learn, even when that means making messes. But when you’re hurting people or property, that’s certainly a time to bring in discipline. Do I like harsh punishments? No. Do I think you deserve to have your ball taken away if you keep throwing it at my head? Absolutely. That mom is free to raise her kids how she wants, but I was not going to stick around and deal with the consequences haha.
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Thanks, I’m going to play with that too. I definitely think the “simpleness” of the art is part of the appeal. Makes it seem like a daydream.
It can be tough to find the balance between letting kids be creative and making them follow rules. Your stance seems very reasonable to me.
I err on the side of freedom and creatively too, though even that has its limits. For example, Brontë went through a lengthy phase of painting things with her poo. She’d just reach back into her diaper then massage her poop ALL OVER the walls, over mirrors, and in every house crack she could find.
Beyond that, kids have strong urges to dump every drawer and container they can find, then just walk off (if they aren’t grinding the contents into the floor). You literally end up spending hours cleaning it up, every day…
So it can be a tough call sometimes, but that’s part of the deal. I think some parents are so afraid of making a mistake, they end up not having any rules at all.
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I read that bit about Bronte and immediately went, “NOPE!” Haha. I have no idea how I’d deal with that. Sometimes it’s pretty clear/easy to come up with a consequence that matches the crime, but not in that case!
You should definitely play with paint and see what you think. I look forward to seeing your creations 🙂
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Amanda!! Hi! Do you remember me? No? you don’t? that’s—that’s okay. no really. it’s fine. I’ve been gone since June or so. No no. Don’t try to console me, I’m fine.
It’s just that one time? I worked at a library? And my boss’s boss asked me to pet sit for a week? So I did. She had a dog that shed and a cat that shed. I’m pretty okay with dogs, but if I cuddle the ones that shed my eyes itch. My body just literally can’t even with cats. I thought I could find a way to survive, but of course the morning that I had to work with The Public, my face exploded. My face was so swollen that one eye was closed shut. I pulled my hair over to cover that side so maybe The Public wouldn’t be afraid to ask questions.
Word got around and my boss’s boss never asked me to pet sit again because she felt bad.
Memories.
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Haha of course I remember you! I wondered where you’d gone to! And your poor eye/face must have felt so miserable. I’m glad your boss was nice enough to feel bad about that one 🙂
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I sort of was, too. Because cats have the super power to make my face explode from afar, I don’t trust them or really like them. It’s not that I have hate in my heart for them — I like animals — I just don’t favor cats, y’know? I feel like they’re always plotting something evil.
But I really liked her dog and wished I could have some good ol’ one on one time. So I kind of felt bad that the dog and I couldn’t be friends.
However, in your story, the cat’s evil worked in your favor. So I guess in that instance, I can applaud the cat. Hm. Maybe they’re not always bad.
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